Monday, October 16, 2017

Peninsula

But I feel I grow old
not older

and I get tougher
Instead of stronger

and uninterested
instead of patient

I demean
instead of rationalize 

and every step of the way
I am no longer amazed
only rarely surprised

I am no longer a child
but this cannot be what "adult" means either

And I do not remember
when I began
fitting in
so well

I believed I was round 
infinite
but I have edges
and this time they don't hurt 
me
but maybe others 

and I feel fine

and that is the worst part

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Spectator

Nowadays we share nothing
but space 
I remember how easily we exhanged
empty promises
that now float around us
I do not feel
anger
or 
sadness
but I feel like
I had to become shallow
in order to fit
in this reality 
and 
an abudance of people
sharing your love
playing their roles
smiling
you never made me smile
except for
the days when I dreamt
how it would be to be with you
but I didn't know 
it would hurt 
that 
much
and I never knew
that you would want to 
kill me
and I never imagined that I would want to
survive


Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Bedtime stories

You hurt
like a broken bone
or an open wound
I chase after
what I think you are offering me
and then you take it back
or at least I think you do
Sometimes I see a silver lining,
but it's not enough
I'd like a silver sky
and right now I wish it would stop raining
but after all
it's autumn here 


Tuesday, September 19, 2017

AmitiƩ Extraordinaire

I had a little friend
we used to dance all night
to pop melodies
try to sing like the tall pretty girls

our nights were filled
with chocolate and pineapples
we used to cut the world
and glue it back together
hang it on walls
look at it and laugh
we used to write stories
lock ourselves in bathrooms

my little friend grew bigger
and all of that slowly faded away
but we would still share
...
 15 dreams
15 secrets
15 years that created
distance
but inside these 15 years

I found more than a million reasons
to love you
and want you to stay
but wherever you go
if you are closer to reaching for the stars
that is enough for me

we will always find someplace to dance




Monday, July 31, 2017

Rain

You are chocolate ice cream
and sour cherries
you are a silver lining
in a very dark sky
you are a link
to everything that was innocent.

You are someone I would hurt
over and over
until you turned grey
until you'd lose your shine.

You are one of the best things
that ever happened to me
as non poetic as this sounds
I cannot express it otherwise
Letting you go
makes me feel lost

and I don't think I ever can
and I don't think I ever will

you grew roots
inside of me
and every once in while
a flower blooms
and I find peace








Thursday, June 8, 2017

Limbo

I will never demand
for
much
but if you decide
to offer me
something
please don't take it back;
for I have been deprived
of the simplest things
as have all of us
But I cannot bear
to hold on to
frivolous words
of no value
to you
that mean the world
to me;
because the pages cannot be erased
only torn apart
and I already feel old 
and I think
once again
of burning
the book



Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Chemical

People form connections.
Little molecules of madness intertwine.
Atoms of restlessness and elements of pursuit collide
and find place in another person.

The soul will dance
with whomever it wants to dance.

People are eternal.
Moments are not fleeting,
they are not trivial,

I know what makes your heart sing
I wrote the song

and I prefer your winter
to anyone else's spring