Thursday, December 29, 2011

Where you end, I begin.

      If I could use one word to describe this year, it would be controversial. Relatives died, plans fell apart, hope drowned deeper into our debt, but through all this I managed to make radical changes, and take a step forward to becoming a better person.
Since I've already taken this never- ending path to "perfection", I decided to make this year's resolutions the most difficult ones (Yes, this time, they are real resolutions). So I've come down to those.

 1. I will reduce my self- destructive attitude. That means, a) not getting into situations that will surely hurt me, b) not trying to make my life more complicated than it already is,  for no reason.
2. I will learn to let go of the past. Moving on is something you have to do on your own. Forgetting stuff (people, situations, addictions etc, etc), and going back to them when they turn up again, is not moving on. It's... forgetting. You have to be really sure, that no matter what, you.will.NOT.go.back. 
   - Here I can add : Realising that something doesn't provide me with anything positive anymore, and simply holds me back, is of crucial importance.

3. I will stop doing so many things just for the sake of doing them. I think I've been addicted to collecting experiences. Especially this year, while looking back, I come across so many things that I can't seem to understand why I did. Well, truth is I can, but the reasons are not really notable. But the thing is, "empty" experiences are as good as no experiences. Or maybe not. Maybe if I didn't have all these "empty" experiences I wouldn't come to that conclusion. Ok, ok I'll stop talking to myself!

4. I' ll keep space for another resolution or two. Just in case.

  (& I will stop biting my nails.)

  I know I won't make much progress in these areas but at least, I'll try harder this time, since I rarely do stuff unless I'm forced

So here 2012, I'm ready to take you on!.... not

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