Open wounds

I have to account for
all the battles that I've lost
and they were far too many

at least for my taste

the hardest thing
is to accept failure
even though you feel
it was everything else's fault
but that is the only way
you will find peace
say "I could not
it was only I who couldn't
and somebody else can"
then there will be nothing left to do
but leave

but I've already said so much lately
that I'm not sure
if it's the hardest part
but it feels
like
yet
another death
and I feel like I've died too many times lately

at least for my taste

Lost Battle Painting by Alison Johnson